The Rule Every Successful Man Lives By (And How You Can Too)

There’s a man I know. Let’s call him Jack. He’s in his mid-40s, married with two kids, running a small business that used to feel like a dream but now feels like a slow, unrelenting grind. Jack wakes up every morning already exhausted. His days blur together—work, bills, obligations—a carousel that never stops spinning.

But what eats at Jack most isn’t the grind. It’s the gnawing sense that he was made for more. Deep down, he knows there’s a greater purpose for his life, but he feels stuck—like life handed him a script he never chose. And worst of all? He’s lost the confidence he once had to rewrite it.

If Jack’s story feels familiar, keep reading. The answer to his—and maybe your—struggle is simpler than you might think. And it lies in the Pareto Principle.

The Core of the Pareto Principle: Focus and Transformation

The Pareto Principle, or the 80/20 rule, states that 80% of outcomes come from 20% of efforts. It’s a law of imbalance that governs everything from your investments to your relationships.

The tragedy for most men like Jack is that they’re pouring themselves into the wrong 80%. They spend hours hustling at work but neglect their health. They invest energy trying to “fix” their marriage but ignore their own inner turmoil. They do everything but the 20% that would truly move the needle.

Here’s the truth that no one’s told you: the key to breaking free isn’t working harder—it’s working wiser. When you identify and commit to the 20% that matters most, you unlock exponential results.

Think of the words of Solomon: “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.” The battle begins in your mind. That’s why this isn’t just about productivity; it’s about transformation.

Jordan Peterson echoes this: “Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world.” The Pareto Principle starts with you: your beliefs, your habits, and your priorities.

Byron Katie’s wisdom hits like a freight train here: “Who would you be without your story?” Most men’s 80% is rooted in limiting beliefs and trauma-fueled narratives. Those stories keep you grinding in futility.

Science backs this up. Studies from Psychological Bulletin reveal that focusing on high-impact areas reduces cognitive overload and increases life satisfaction. Identifying your 20% isn’t just a productivity hack; it’s a neurobiological reset.

Consider Lion Goodman’s work in healing subconscious beliefs. Men who recalibrate their internal compass—shifting from “I have to prove my worth” to “I am inherently worthy”—find they suddenly have the capacity to focus on what truly matters.

Then there’s Erwin McManus, who teaches, “Your focus determines your future.” When Jack finally dared to apply this principle, he cut his work hours by 30%, devoted mornings to his health, and invested in one meaningful conversation with his wife each day. The result? His business grew, his energy returned, and his marriage flourished.

How This Works for You

What’s possible when you apply the Pareto Principle? Let’s break it down:

• Health: Focus on the 20% of habits that deliver 80% of results. (Hint: Diet and movement trump everything else.)

• Wealth: Double down on the high-value tasks that create the majority of your income. Delegate or eliminate the rest.

• Relationships: Spend your energy on the small, intentional actions that deepen trust and connection.

• Purpose: Clarify what really matters to you and ruthlessly eliminate distractions.

As Paul Tripp says, “Every treasure you seek is an invitation to worship something greater.” The Pareto Principle calls you to stop chasing lesser treasures and pursue the life you were made for.

Your Turn

Here’s your next step: take 30 minutes today to reflect. Write down the areas of your life where you’re expending 80% effort for 20% results. Then, identify the 20% that will make the most significant impact.

Commit to focusing on that 20% for the next 30 days. Journal your progress. Adjust as needed. You’ll be amazed at how quickly your life begins to shift.

The time for change isn’t next week or on January 1st. It’s now. By applying the Pareto Principle to your health, wealth, relationships, and purpose, you can rewrite the script of your life—a script that leads to freedom, confidence, and fulfillment.

Don’t stay stuck like Jack. Take the leap today. Click here to enroll in the Life Audit designed to help men like you identify their 20% and start winning in every area of life.

Cheers,

Matt

P.S. If this was helpful for you, it might be helpful for someone else. Feel free to share it. My goal is to help as many men as possible stop settling and start living. 🤙